It is with deep regret and sorrow that i have to report the passing of a very dear and close friend of mine–“Billy ■■■■■■■”
Billy was taken from me on Wednesday 9th April. His end was peaceful as he was taken from me in sleep.
Billy was taken ill 3 years ago, medical negligence during an operation resulted in the loss of a vital life source–ie blood supply. During the past 3 years his condition slowly deteriorated and he withered away to a fraction of his former size.
It is sad to reflect that Billy has left me before compensation for his mis-treatment has been awarded, but he can rest in peace in the knowledge that settlement in the courts is only a matter of months away and it will give some comfort to who he has left behind.
He is survived by, but sorely missed by his twin-“Bertie ■■■■■■■” who can only give me half the comfort and warm feeling of a tender caress
RIP BILLY
Well-it’s my news anyway–just my way of letting you lot know that following a blunder during a hernia repair 3 years ago-- i had what was remaining of my left testicle removed in hospital last Wednesday.
Well done on seeing the lighter side of it Ozzie, and best of best of luck for a happy outcome over the mistreatment of Billy.
Not in the same scale but I myself will also soon be saying farewell to “Tommy Front Tooth”. “Tommy” and his close friend “Timmy” suffered an unfortunate sporting incident many years ago causing them to temporarily leave their usual home. They where swiftly returned and have been quite happy there until last week when “Tommy” encountered a rather crunchy item and decided to upsticks and attempt to leave his roots behind him. He’s had a change of heart now though and decided to hang around (literally) causing much annoyance to the owner of his previous home, the owner is however at great blooomin expense having him and his root forceable removed a week today upon which the owner shall hopefully be able to celebrate with a ruddy good meal!
Yep…should be just a little quicker on the 1/4 mile now Ozzie!
When Im drunk I sometime relay the story of my first Vasectomy, when during the healing process the tube welded itself to the inside of the wound in my ■■■■■■■…nice!
As a matter of interest (strange I know) but did they give you a false ball? I know when I did a stint in A&E and Theatre at a local hospital, for cosmetic and ‘ergonomic’ reasons, if a patient was relieved of one…they sneaked a falser in there!
As a matter of interest (strange I know) but did they give you a false ball?
Mark
I did think of asking them to whip the other one out as well and replace both with a couple of snooker cue balls—but they told me this was’nt available on the National Elf
I’d need to be at the front of the cue
Seriously Mark-i know this would have been an option if i had pursued the matter but my prime concern was to get rid of what had withered and died inside me–no Doc or consultant ever convinced me that what i was left with would never turn into something nasty–so first choice was to get rid of it.
Thanks for the enquiry though–makes wonderful conversation :lol: :lol:
You could have had some musical ones or ones that kept count of how may times the wife gave them a squeeze…like one of those queue counters at the cinema!!!
Even at this time of the day you are sharp OZZIE!!!
